I have made somewhat of a habit of going for walks of late. And sometimes I traverse the large cemetery near my house. For me cemeteries are difficult places to be. I don’t know anyone buried at this cemetery, but I have to look straight ahead and avoid walking between headstones if I hope to avoid making an embarassment of myself. Yet I voluntarily walk into it and have been doing it more often lately.
There are times when I will catch a glimpse of a headstone that says “Beloved Mother” or something like that, but worse are the ones that say “Beloved Son”. Being a father of two young children, the worst by far are the ones that say things like “1986 – 1992”. I can’t bear to read too many and never linger in one place. It’s best if I just keep moving — find something to distract myself from the sadness. Sometimes it’s all I can do not to find a secluded place and curl up into a ball.
While cemeteries are very sad, emotionally wrenching places for me the reason I do go is that I have only recently discovered that they also have a life-affirming quality. When I am going through difficult times it helps me to be reminded of the things that are important. There is nothing quite so instructive as walking through a place where so many loved ones for so many people have gone. There is nothing that so clearly makes me see that the most important things in my life are my loved ones. Nothing else really matters to my happiness but having them. Without people you love and who love you back…. what’s the point of living? All of my other problems melt away and are put back where they belong — farther down the list.
To have loved ones is to be wealthy. To measure wealth in any other way is folly.
So true Onestring. Enjoyed your article.